Weak week.

If you know anything about the Bible, then you are familiar with Job.  God loved who Job was so much that he allowed Satan to mess with his (Job’s) life.  Through the tragedy that Satan put Job through, his love and devotion of God did not falter (it is important to note that his spirit did…which is more than understandable).  Job, through loss and devastation commited his life and love to God.  Because of this life and love devoted to God, he had an incredibly blessed ending (read it, yourself)!

This week, Molly (and I, indirectly) had her second miscarriage in two years.   Arghhh!  NOTE:  Please understand that this is an incredibly personal topic and we are sharing it to help others, not to invite help for ourselves - thank you.  1 out of 4 pregnancies end this way.  Yes, it’s common but… that doesn’t take away the pain, sadness, anger, confusion, etc.  The past 5 years we have felt like Job (with this and other losses in our life).  Job had pain, sadness, anger, confusion, etc., yet he did not love God any less.  There are few revealed answers to all of the questions we have.  It has been an incredibly difficult place to be.  Thankfully, we have hope and love…all we need. 

This is where we are at this week.  It has been a weak week. 

Here are the lyrics of a Sanctus Real song that has brought us comfort in this time:

Whatever You’re doing inside of me, it feels like chaos, but I believe You’re up to something bigger than me.  Larger than life, something Heavenly.  Something Heavenly.

Cruise Control

The last two days’ Swerve talks about “disrupting” the comfortable patterns we find ourselves in.  This has resonated with me in a big way!  There are areas of my life where I feel like I am on cruise control.  For me this means I am too comfortable.  Now comfort is fine, but not if I am “cruising” with regard to these main areas:

• My relationship with family and friends
• My prayer, worship, Bible study and obedience of God
• My leadership and love as a husband and father

Cruise control is fine if you’re on the highway and want efficient travel from point A to point B.  However, we should never “cruise” through life (and our relationship with God and others).  I want/need to be sharp, passionate, loving, wise, selfless (not selfish) and growing! 

Are you “cruising”?

 

Peace Makers (1 of 3)

This past weekend, my parents came over from New Hampshire to hang out and help us celebrate Madison’s 6th birthday (she had a “surfer girl” themed party).  Before they left , I shared something with them that was on my heart.  I told them that I thought they were great “peace makers.” 

I explained to them that they:

• Set an example of what it means to work hard to see the good in people (while not being naive to the bad)
• Go out of their way to include people in conversations, parties, events, etc.
• Speak words of encouragement in times when there only seems to be discouragement.
• React to those who are in need immediately and without an additional thought or hesitation (they operate out of instinct).
• They hold their thoughts and words captive when they see something they disagree with (they would speak only if necessary and it would benefit the situation/person).
• They don’t judge or play psychologist.  It’s not them.

People enjoy being around my parents.  It’s not because they have rock star personalities, have flashy “stuff” or tell crazy jokes or stories… BUT because when you are with them YOU feel important and at peace.

Do you have a peace maker in your life?  Are you a peace maker?   

On Our Heart…

Molly and I were chatting last night about Easter.  We were wondering what God would think about the way we celebrate it.  Similar to Christmas, it’s easy to get caught up in the hussle and prep of the day (i.e. dinner plans, church preparation, tradition, family, etc.).  We had a great day at church, with family and with God…. BUT, something did not quite settle with us in regards to our heart. 

Together we intentionally decided to commit to a new TEST for our lives (we have subconciously tried to follow this, but never consciously).  This test is:  “If we are too busy (or tired, distracted, etc.) to love God and others, we are too busy.”  If we fail the TEST, we take action, cut something out, change our attitude…or whatever. 

What test do you use for your life?

Love.

I have been hit hard lately with verses, quotes and conversations regarding “love.” 

 I grew up in a family who didn’t outwardly express love much at all (like hugs, words, kissing, etc.).  Except… my dad still calls me “honey,” which is totally funny now that I think about it.    Anyway, the love we had for each other was strong, but understood and not expressed.  To be honest, until I met my wife, I was content with my family’s approach to love… in fact, I didn’t know anything different.  My wife needs hugs, kisses, words of affirmation, etc… can you imagine that?!  Crazy!    Thankfully, I was willing to change (and needed to change).   Now, fast forward 12 years… what a great thing love is, when it is understood AND expressed.   I am a changed man.

So, I have been reading in 1 John the past few days and there are several verses that say (I am summarizing) that our love for others will be a indication of how much and whether we love God.  Also, the second greatest commandment is to “love others.”  AND… I heard a quote on the Catalyst podcast that Billy Graham said, “it is the Holy Spirit’s job to convict, God’s job to judge and our job to love.”

With all that being said, it seems like God’s trying to get my attention in the “love others” category.  It is easy to love my wife, family and close friends.  However, I know I need to step up my love of others.  I like meeting people, getting to know them and seeing how they “tick.”  To be honest, I don’t seek them out and when God puts them in my path, I don’t know how to go from “like” to “love.”  This is a challenging concept to embrace.  Yet, it is the indicator of my love for God, a commandment and as Billy Graham stated, “my job.”  My heart aches knowing I must do more.

Anyone have any insight or thoughts on this?

PS – As a cool side note, my dad and I now hug, my sister, mom and I exchange “I love you’s,” and it is great!  Can’t wait for the next love level with them…  

Valentine’s Day Vow

I love my wife.  I mean I really love her!  Unfortunately, I take my love and relationship with her for granted.  Subconsciously, I know that I don’t have to treat her like a queen for her to love me and for our love to endure.  This is WRONG and STUPID!  What an idiot!  God gave me an incredible gift… why don’t I (or we, if you can relate) FULLY embrace her?!  I made a giant leap yesterday my penning my own vow to her on Valentine’s Day.  Because it is a public proclamation and not intended to be private in ANY WAY, I want to share it with the world!

my yow… 

This 14th day of February, Two Thousand and Eight

On this day, I recommit to you my life and my eternal vow to you, Molly Whittaker.

I vow to passionately & completely love you forever*

I vow to not allow divorce or adultery into our marriage*

I vow to love you single mindedly (not narrow or open mindedly)*

I vow to lift our marriage above riches, poverty, illness and strength*

I vow to make you my “number two” and not allow anything to take your place*

I vow to raise our daughter or children displaying our love for one another and God*

I vow to love and lead you with fire, wisdom, righteousness, passion, strength and humility!*

I vow to stoke my own burning love for you and not declare, “I will love you as you love me.”*

*This love and this vow to you is second to my love and vow to Jesus Christ.

  In this, I recommit to you my life and eternal vow, Molly Whittaker.      

V Day eve…

I am an “out of the box” kind of guy.  I don’t like the usual, normal, wide road, etc…  This quality works to my advantage and disadvantage. 

As for Valentine’s Day, I am not a dozen roses, box of chocolates, a $5 card or stuffed teddy bear kind of guy.  Thankfully, my wife is not that kind of girl, either… otherwise, I’d be in trouble every year .  I try to do something unexpected (not usually on a grand scale), sweet and memorable. 

On the eve of Valentine’s Day I am making preparations… I’ll update you tomorrow.  What are your Valentine’s Day plans?

Lost in Indonesia

I received a card from a long lost cousin today who just returned from a year long photography trip to Asia.  Honestly, these photos are some of the most incredible I have ever seen http://www.eyeballimaging.com/blog.  Here’s a taste…

Nothing is the new “something”

Yesterday, I did nothing!  It was great!  Molly, Madi and I hung around the house, played Wii together, watched a movie together, read a book (with Madi) and some other casual fun stuff together.  I am so not used to this… but, I COULD GET USED TO THIS!

 If you haven’t done “nothing” lately (double negative), go for it!  It’s the new “something!” 

Cutest little chick, EVER!

Last Friday, we went to NYC to see Cirque de Soleil’s, “Wintuk.”  We did the whole Times Square, 5th Ave, Rockefeller Center gig… AND HAD A BLAST!  It was a great family time with my wife and daughter.  YOU have to make time for family.  Work has to always take a back seat… it will always be there… family might not.

 Here’s a pic of my daughter, Madison.  If you couldn’t tell, she had a blast, too.